Saying Good-Bye

It has been a busy week. Papa is getting as much of Koyla as he can before he leave and Yana is saying her good byes to friends. Mama is preparing for Rick and Yana's departure. This is also the time that I prepare to leave this apartment we are living in and enter into phase two by moving into the church apartment on the other side of town. This has all gone by so fast, until Rick and Yana left, then time stopped.

Monday and Tuesday night Koyla spent the night at our apartment. Wednesday morning we prepared for the departure of Rick and Yana. Our plan was to get up early to finish Yana's studies and then take a taxi to Yana's grandma's house to say good-bye. The two women, grandma and great-grandma are such happy people. They encouraged Yana and were so positive. They shared such love with Yana and Koyla and for Rick and myself. They shared how grateful they were that we adopted Yana and blessed us with God's blessings. They made the departure easy and cheerful. What a honor God has given me to have met these two humble ladies that we are now waving good-bye to as we drive away from their humble dwelling that is hidden from the main road by a dirt path that a car can barely drive on.

Next stop is our journey to Tokmak. We are all taking the bus to Tokmak and then Yana and Rick will continue from there to catch the train in Zaporyzha. Granda has been calling Yana and making sure that we stop to visit before she leaves so he can say good-bye. The bus ride is hot and bumpy and the only air comes from the vent opened on the roof of the bus. The air blast you right in the face. It is not a comfort ride, but no one complains, this is life in Ukraine. We arrive in Tokmak and take a taxi to Grandpa's house. There he is waiting at the door for us along with a life long family friend. This is a woman that was close to grandma before she past away. Grandpa apologized for the condition of the house, he said when his wife died he gave up caring for the house and now it needs so much. Yana found a drawer full of pictures. She spent time going through them gathering ones that had meaning to her. All the pictures that we had set to Koyla of Yana decorated grandpa's living room. The pictures Yana took home with her we will scan and send back to grandpa. There are treasures in the pictures. I got to see Yana's mom in her prime. She was a beautiful lady. Grandpa told Yana that her mother was dead. Yana was disturbed by the news and wanted to know if it was really true. She thought maybe grandpa would say something like that so that she would put mom behind her and not wonder about her. I told her I would try to find out when I go for Koyla birth certificate.

The departure was hard for both Yana and grandpa. Grandpa is very emotional, the departure had lots of tears. He too showed Rick and myself such love and warmth. He holds such a special place in our hearts for who he is in these children's lives. Yana doesn't shed tears too often, this one brought out the tears. Koyla will see grandpa on our way to the train station next week, that will be really difficult for him.

We take the taxi to the bus station. What I invisioned as a sweet good-bye to Yana and Papa turned out to be anxiety and confusion because the buses in both directions were ready to take off. The taxi has to be paid, the tickets need to be bought, Papa and mama don't know what anyone is saying which always makes the confusion more intense. We hurry, kiss, rush, trip on to the buses and then we sit there for 10 minutes on this hot, smelly bus waiting to depart. Koyla body language says it all. He stares out the window, sunk in, just full of sorrow. He was perfectly happy living with grandpa in Tokmak even if there was no food and no water, and life was dirty, and hard. Grandpa was real sick when he gave up his legal rights to Koyla. He would have lost those right anyway if he hadn't turned them over when he did. Koyla's standard of living was pretty bad.

Koyla and I returned to Berdyansk and walked to the orphanage. Galina gave us permission to have him for 2 nights and then he had to go home. He hated going back, I hated taking him back. I could have used the company that night myself. We said our good-byes and I walked home. The apartment was too quite. I got a phone call from some friends asking me if I wanted to walk the boardwalk with them. I jumped at the chance to be with people. By the time I got home I was exhausted and emotionally spent.

Thursday I spent time with Koyla at the beach, we went out to eat, bought a new i-pod for the plane trip home, and went back to the orphanage. The plan that we last had with the director of the orphanage was Koyla could spend 2 nights with me and one at the orphanage, then 2 nights with me. I planned to take him on Friday night again. When I went to get him, again, the plans had changed. The orphanage was having a government inspection. All rules are being followed, with no execption. Legally Koyla is not allowed to spent time off campus with me until Monday, the end of the 10 day waiting period. Therefore, I have to visit him at the orphanage for the weekend and I can take him on Monday for the night. I was really looking forward to this weekend in the new apartment with Koyla. So much for my plan.

The adoption of both of our children have been a journey, not an event. God has made me so dependant on him in both adoptions that I know this is His plan and not my own. He has put people in my path that are treasures I would have never experienced if I did it my way. He has shown me that His will is far more important then my comfort and His glory will be revealed in His plan, not mine. I am sitting in my big apartment by myself still amazed at His grace, He is an awesome God.